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Funny Jokes

The largest collection of jokes.

Dead dog

Mom and Dad were trying to console Susie, whose dog had recently died.
“You know, its not your fault that the dog died. Hes probably up in heaven right now, having a grand old time with God.”
Susie, still crying, said “What would God want with a dead dog?”

Zadnji dodani Animal Jokes

Hunting

Two guys were out hunting, but they werent getting any ducks.
“What do you think the problem is?” one man asked his companion.
“I dunno,” came the reply, “Maybe we arent throwing the dog up high enough.”

Why do dogs stick their noses in womens crotches?

Q: Why do dogs stick their noses in womens crotches?

A: Because they can.

Whats the difference between a bull and a cow?

Q: Whats the difference between a bull and a cow?

A: A bull smiles when you milk it.

Porridge

It’s a sunny morning in the big forest and the Bear family is just waking up. Baby Bear goes downstairs and sits in his small chair at the table. He looks into his small bowl. It is empty! “Who’s been eating my porridge!” he squeaks. Daddy Bear arrives at the table and sits in his big chair. He looks into his big bowl. It is also empty! “Who’s been eating my porridge?” he roars. Mommy Bear puts her head through the serving hatch from the kitchen and screams, “For Goodness sake, how many times do we have to go through this? I haven’t made the porridge yet!”

A bugs life

Q. What is the last thing to go through a bug’s mind when it hits your windshield?
A. It’s butt.