Who’s That Dog?
There was a hound dog laying in the yard and an old geezer in overalls was sitting on the porch. ”Excuse me, sir, but does your dog bite?” a tourist asked. The old man looked up over his newspaper and replied, ”Nope.” As soon as the tourist stepped out of his car, the dog began snarling and growling, and then attacked both his arms and legs. As the tourist flailed around in the dust, he yelled, ”I thought you said your dog didn’t bite!” The old man muttered, ”Ain’t my dog.”
Grapes
A duck walks into a store and asks the clerk, “Do you have any grapes?” The clerk says no.
Five minutes later the duck comes back and asks, “Do you have any grapes?” and again the clerk says no.
Five minutes later the duck comes back and asks, “Do you have any grapes?”
The clerk says, “No, and if you ask again, I’ll nail your feet to the floor.”
The duck comes back five minutes later and asks, “Do you have any nails?” The clerk says no. The duck says, “Good. Do you have any grapes?”
Whats the difference between a bull and a cow?
Q: Whats the difference between a bull and a cow?
A: A bull smiles when you milk it.
Not Your Typical Chicken Joke
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Part of a the CIA’s specially trained elite team of fowl, this stealthy chicken is on a perilous misson.
His object? No less than to uncover the secret documents of the infamous Polish scientist, Dr. Poppycockski.
Dr. Poppycockski, code name: Cock, has outlandish, yet devilsihly clever plans for total world domination, which begin with the great nation of Haiti.
Kangaphant
What do you get when you cross an elephant and kangaroo together?
Giant holes all over Africa!