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Funny Jokes

The largest collection of jokes.

Blonde Driving

Q: Why did the blonde get pulled over by the police?

A: Her headlights weren’t working, so she was flashing people.

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Blonde with Money

A blonde and a brunette were opening their paychecks when the blonde asked the brunette what she was going to buy.

The brunette replied, “I think I’ll buy a new set of plates because mine are chipped. What are you going to buy?”

The blonde said, “I think I’m gonna buy a new butt, because my old one has an enormous crack in it.

Blondes in a Volkswagen

Q: What do you call four blondes in a Volkswagen?

A: Far-from-thinkin

KFC

Why did the blonde go to KFC?
She heard she could get a pair of breasts for $1.99.

Blonde Kidnapper

A blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, ’’I’ve kidnapped you.’’
She then wrote a note saying,’’I’ve kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan tree next to the slide on the north side of the playground. Signed, A Blonde.’’ The blonde pinned the note to the kid’s shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents.

The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree. The blonde opened up the bag and found the $10,000 with a note that said, ’’How could you do this to a fellow blonde?’’

Blonde Brick

What’s the difference between a blonde and a brick?

When you lay a brick, it doesn’t follow you around for three days.