Blonde with Money
A blonde and a brunette were opening their paychecks when the blonde asked the brunette what she was going to buy.
The brunette replied, “I think I’ll buy a new set of plates because mine are chipped. What are you going to buy?”
The blonde said, “I think I’m gonna buy a new butt, because my old one has an enormous crack in it.
Blondes in a Volkswagen
Q: What do you call four blondes in a Volkswagen?
Why did the blonde go to KFC?
She heard she could get a pair of breasts for $1.99.
A blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, ’’I’ve kidnapped you.’’
She then wrote a note saying,’’I’ve kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan tree next to the slide on the north side of the playground. Signed, A Blonde.’’ The blonde pinned the note to the kid’s shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents.
The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree. The blonde opened up the bag and found the $10,000 with a note that said, ’’How could you do this to a fellow blonde?’’
What’s the difference between a blonde and a brick?
When you lay a brick, it doesn’t follow you around for three days.