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Funny Jokes

The largest collection of jokes.

Blonde Test

What happens to you when you find out a blonde passed a test?

You wake up.

Zadnji dodani Blonde Jokes

Swervey Blondes

A cop pulled over a car for swerving all over the road. The blonde at the wheel looked very confused and scared.

“What’s going on here, ma’am?”

“Well, I was driving along when all of a sudden there was a tree right in my path. I swerved to miss it, but there was another tree. And after that, another, and another.” The cop looked inside her car and sighed.

“Ma’am. That’s your air freshener.”

Blonde does some painting

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.

“Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?” asked the owner.

The blonde said, “How about 50 dollars?”

The man agreed and told her the paint and other materials that she might need were in the garage. The man’s wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, “Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?”

The man replied, “She should, she was standing on it.”

A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.

“You’re finished already?” he asked.

“Yes,” the blonde answered, “and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats.”

Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50, gave it to her and said he’d call her whenever he had another job for her to do.

The blond thanked him and, as she was walking back down the path, she called out “And by the way, I know everybody thinks blondes are stupid, but I thought you should know that it’s not a Porch, it’s a Ferrari.”

How do you tell?

Q: How do you tell when a blonde reaches orgasm?
A1: She drops her nail-file!
A2: Who cares?
A3: She says, “Next”.
A4: The next person in the queue taps you on the shoulder.
A5: He’s had his clothes for about 2 minutes.
A6: I mean, who really cares?
A7: The batteries have run out.

Puzzle Pieces

Three blondes have just finished a jigsaw-puzzle so they decide to celebrate by going out. They walk into a bar chanting, “61 days 61 days!” The bartender gets curious and walks over to them and asks, “Why are you chanting 61 days?”

One of the three answer, “Because the box said 3-6 years!”

Blondes and Colds

Q: Why is it okay for blondes to catch cold?

A: They don’t have to worry about blowing their brains out.