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Funny Jokes

The largest collection of jokes.

Cheating

A blonde suspects that her boyfriend is cheating on her, so she goes out and buys a gun.

She goes to his apartment that same day, with the gun in hand. Sure enough, when she opens the door, she finds her boyfriend in the arms of a redhead. She points the gun at her boyfriend at stares him down for a moment. Then, suddenly, she’s overcome with grief, so she puts the gun up to the side her head.

Her boyfriend screams, “Honey, don’t do it…”

The blonde yells back, “Shut up! You’re next!”

Latest Blonde Jokes

Kiss Me I’m Blonde

Why do blondes wear green lipstick?

Because red means stop!

Upside Down Blonde

What do you call a blonde standing on her head?

A brunette with bad breath.

Elmo Factory

Once there was a blonde who really needed some money. She saw an ad in the newspaper for a job at an Elmo factory. She went down and applied, but the manager told her that she wouldn’t want the job because it was so boring. The blonde begged him and told him she would do anything because she needed the money really bad. After long consideration the manager hired her. After a few hours the manager looked at the video-monitor showing the factory floor and saw that the conveyer belt was backed up. The manager went downstairs to find out what the problem was. When he arived there the blonde was sewing to marbles into the crotch of every Elmo.

The manager said, “I said to give each Elmo two test tickles; not two testicles!”

Beer bottle

Q: What does a blond and a beer bottle have in common?

A: They’re both empty from the neck up.

Blondes in a Frying Pan

Q.What do you call 3 blondes in a frying pan?

A. Over easy.