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Funny Jokes

The largest collection of jokes.

How do you get a blonde to marry you?

Q: How do you get a blonde to marry you?

A: Tell her she’s pregnant.

Latest Blonde Jokes

Three Girls in the Desert

A blonde, brunette and redhead are in a desert. The brunette says, “I brought some water so we don’t get dehydrated.” The redhead says, “I brought some suntan lotion so we don’t get sunburned.” Then the blonde says I brought a car door.” The other girls said, “Why did you bring that?” Then the blonde says, “So I can roll down the window if it gets hot.”

A blonde and shower

Q: What’s the difference between a blonde and a shower?

A: You don’t have to turn a blonde on to get her wet.

The Genie

A blonde was walking along the beach when she finds an old bottle floating in the water. The blonde goes over and picks it up and notices a cork in the top of the bottle. She pulls out the cork and a genie pops out.
“Thankyou for letting me out after 10000 years, stuck in that bottle and to say thankyou I will give you 3 wishes.
The blonde thinks for a little while and finally decides on her first wish.
“I would like to be 10% smarter”
The genie does her magic and she is turned into a red head.
“I don’t think I am smart enough yet, I would like to be 100% smarter than what I am”
So the Genie does her magic a second time and she turns in to a brunette.
“I don’t think I am smart enough yet I would like to be 1000% smarter than what I am”
So the genie turns her into a man!

Lip stick stains on the steering wheel

Q: Why are there lip stick stains on the steering wheel after a blonde drives a car?

A: Because she blows the horn!

Brainwash

Q: How do you brainwash a blonde?
A: Give her a douche and shake her upside down.