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Funny Jokes

The largest collection of jokes.

Puzzle Pieces

Three blondes have just finished a jigsaw-puzzle so they decide to celebrate by going out. They walk into a bar chanting, “61 days 61 days!” The bartender gets curious and walks over to them and asks, “Why are you chanting 61 days?”

One of the three answer, “Because the box said 3-6 years!”

Latest Blonde Jokes

Lip stick stains on the steering wheel

Q: Why are there lip stick stains on the steering wheel after a blonde drives a car?

A: Because she blows the horn!

Why do blondes always rapidly flap their hands towards theirs ears?

Q: Why do blondes always rapidly flap their hands towards theirs ears?

A: They’re refuelling.

A Natural Blind

A blind man walks into a bar, taps the man next him, and says, “Hey, wanna hear a blonde joke?”
The man says back to the blind man, “Look buddy, I’m blonde. The man behind me is a 400-pound professional wrestler and he is blonde. The bouncer is blonde. The man sitting over to your left is also blonde. Still wanna tell that blonde joke?”

The blind man is silent for a moment and then says, “Nah, I wouldn’t want to have to explain it five times.”

You’ve got mail!

A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blond female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it then slammed it shut and stormed back into the house. A little later she came out of her house again, went to the mailbox and again opened it, and slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went.

As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, she came out again, marched to the mailbox, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever.

Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, “Is something wrong?”

To which she replied, “There certainly is!”

My stupid computer keeps saying, “You’ve got mail!”

Sleeping Blonde

Why was the blonde having trouble sleeping?

She forgot to close her eyes.