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Funny Jokes

The largest collection of jokes.

Soccer Blonde

A blonde began a job as an elementary school counselor and she was eager to help. One day during recess she noticed a girl standing by herself on one side of a playing field while the rest of the kids enjoyed a game of soccer at the other.

The blonde approached and asked if she was all right.

The girl said she was.

A little while later, however, Sandy noticed the girl was in the same spot, still by herself. Approaching again, Sandy offered, “Would you like me to be your friend?”

The girl hesitated, then said, “Okay,” looking at the woman suspiciously.

Feeling she was making progress, the blonde then asked, “Why are you standing here all alone?”

“Because,” the little girl said with great exasperation, “I’m the goalie!”

Latest Blonde Jokes

How do you get a blonde to marry you?

Q: How do you get a blonde to marry you?

A: Tell her she’s pregnant.

Hide and Seek

Q: How many blondes does it take to play Hide and Seek?
A: One.

911

Q: Why did the blonde try and steal a police car?

A: She saw “911” on the back and thought it was a Porsche.

Wanted: Dead Or Alive

An office exec was interviewing a blonde for an assistant position, and wanted to find out a little about her personality.

“If you could have a conversation with anyone, alive or dead, who would it be?”

“I’d have to say the living one.”

Why are blondes like cornflakes

Q: Why are blondes like cornflakes?

A: Because they’re simple, easy and they taste good.