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Funny Jokes

The largest collection of jokes.

Upside Down Blonde

What do you call a blonde standing on her head?

A brunette with bad breath.

Latest Blonde Jokes

Blondes and Waterskiing

Why can you not teach blondes to waterski?

When they get wet, they roll over on their backs!

Gold Accident

There are two blondes playing golf. One tees off and hits a man as he’s walking to the next hole. He immediately clasps his hands over his crotch and falls to his knees in pain.
The two blondes run over and ask him if he is all right. He says that he is fine, but the blondes insist on helping him. They unzip his pants and begin to massage his crotch.

After a while one blonde asks if it feels better, and he says, “That felt good, but my hand still hurts like crazy!”

Three Blondes

There were three blondes living together. Blonde #1 was coming back from grocery shopping, and she dropped her keys. She walked down the stairs to get them, and she said to herself, ”Am I going up the stairs or down the stairs?” So, she stood there puzzled, the bags of groceries still in her hands.

Blonde #2 was taking a bath, and was draining the tub because it was too cold. With her hair still dry, she said to herself, ”Was I getting in the tub or out of the tub?” She stood there, just thinking about it.

Blonde #3 was sitting in the living room in front of the coffee table, and she said to herself, ”Knock on wood I’m not as stupid as the other two!” She knocked the table. ”Was that the front door or the back door?”

Blonde Brick

What’s the difference between a blonde and a brick?

When you lay a brick, it doesn’t follow you around for three days.

KFC

Why did the blonde go to KFC?
She heard she could get a pair of breasts for $1.99.