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Funny Jokes

The largest collection of jokes.

Father Christmas and a detective

What do you get if you cross Father Christmas with a detective?
Santa Clues!

Latest Christmass Jokes

Early Christmas shopping

It was Christmas and the judge was in a merry mood as he asked the suspect, “What are you charged with?”
“Doing my Christmas shopping early,” replied the defendant.
“That’s no offence,” said the judge. “How early were you doing this shopping?”
“Before the store opened,” countered the prisoner.

Claps at Christmas

What do you call a man who claps at Christmas?
Santapplause!

Christmas trees and knitters

Why are Christmas trees like bad knitters?
They both drop their needles!

Afraid of Santa Claus

What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?
Claustrophobic.

Cat on beach and Xmas

Why is a cat on a beach like Christmas?
Because they both have “Sandy claws”!