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Funny Jokes

The largest collection of jokes.

Definition of joke

All of us are fond of listening to jokes and consider it a great form of entertainment. Some of the most amusing forms of jokes include blonde jokes, fishing jokes, golf jokes, Q/A jokes, etc.

What Is A Joke?

A joke is a brief story, observation, or thought that has a definite narrative structure and a punchline and triggers the physiological response in a person – laughter. It is intended to make people happy and laugh.

In most cases, the funniness culminates at the end and it finishes after the listeners feel entertained.

A Brief Look At The History

The earliest surviving jokes date back to 1900 BC. However, if we study basic human nature, we come to know that jokes must be as old as the human himself.

The oldest identified joke is an ancient Sumerian proverb from 1900 BC containing toilet humor.

The earliest joke book is Philogelos, written in the fourth century AD in the Greek language by Hierocles and Philagros.

More data was gathered in the 15th century after the printing revolution. One example is the publishing of a joke book in 1470 written by Italian Poet Poggio Bracciolini.

The first humor magazine is The New Yorker that was published in 1925 for the first time.

Who Writes Jokes?

Comedians are the people who write jokes or perform them. They amuse the audience by giving curious, comical, whimsical, laughable, odd, droll, humorous, witty, and eccentric performances on the stage.

They watch everything from the aspect of humor and convert it into jokes. Some of the examples include fishing jokes, Blonde jokes, Q/A jokes, golf jokes, etc.

It would be right to say that comedians cover various aspects of life and the humerus form.

Examples Of Comedians

Charlie Chaplin and Mr. Bean are considered the most famous and world-renowned comedians while Steve Martin and Judd Apatow have also made it to the top of the comedy world.

The list of comedy performers and comedians is never-ending.

However, it is worth mentioning that jokes are often not only for amusement but sometimes they serve greater purposes. This is something that can be observed in the performances and books of legendary comedians.

What Are The Characteristics Of A Good Joke?

A good joke seems like a combination of storytelling and social commentary. In other words, it not only entertains but also broadens the vision and lets the people think about the world from a different perspective.

There are various forms of jokes (such as blonde jokes, Q/A jokes, fishing jokes, etc) and a great joke must be surpassing the expectations.

A good joke is something that no one should be able to predict before listening to it. In other words, the element of surprise is the most important in jokes.

See the following examples of fishing jokes.

  • Why is it so easy to weigh fish?
    Because they have their own scales!
  • Mother to daughter advice: Cook a man a fish and you feed him for a day.
    But teach a man to fish and you get rid of him for the whole weekend.

What Are The Types Of Jokes?

Although all the jokes revolve around the basic setup of punchline and overall amusement, they are classified into various types.

Here are the most popular types of jokes.

Observational: These jokes cover the most trivial events of life and are often related to daily observations and experiences. For example, Blonde Jokes relate to the blonde people.

Anecdotal: They reveal the personal life experiences of the comedian.

Situational: They describe the funny moments of an event, place, or set of characters.

One-liners: These are the brief and concise forms of jokes that convert the punchline into the succinct form.

Character: Some comedians stay particular during the show or performance. Such hilarious and amusing performances are part of character jokes.

Ironic: These are the jokes that convey the meaning opposite to what is said. They are usually in the form of witty statements.

For example, look at the following Q/A Jokes.

  • How is ‘Communism’ one of the most ironic terms? It is capitalized.
  • What can be the most ironic name for a chubby person? Jim.

Farcical: These jokes involve the creation of humor using exaggerated stories.

Self-deprecating: These are the jokes in which comedians make fun of the other people they know.

For example,

“I went to the psychiatrist, and he said ‘You’re crazy.’ I tell him I want a second opinion. He says, ‘Okay, you’re ugly too!’”

Slapstick: It is a physical form of comedy in which the comedian often gets slapped or hit by something in a humorous manner.

We hope you have enjoyed this guide on funny jokes!

Latest Jokes

Christmas in West Virginia

Twas the Night before Christmas, and all through the shack

Not a creature was stirrin’, cept the lice on muh back.

The Skoal cans wuz nailed to the screen door with care,

With hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there.

The children were sleepin’, all snug in their beds,

While visions of tractor pulls danced in their heads.

And Ma in her nightgown all stained with pound cake.

Had just settled down to watch Ricki Lake.

When out in the driveway, a loud noise I heard,

I opened the winder to check muh T-bird.

I ran to the door, like I’s on a mission,

But I tripped on some parts from muh granny’s transmission.

The moon shone outside, the hound dog wuz barkin’.

Muh daughter weren’t home yet, she wuz still out parkin’.

When what to muh whiskey blind eyes should I see

But a Chevy S-10, pulled by eight flyin’ sheep.

With a fat nasty driver, so disgustin’ and sick

I said, “Shoot Fire! That must be St. Nick!

More rapid than X-lax his wooly sheep came

And he belched and he hollered, and he called ’em by name.

Now CLIFFORD! Now VERNON! Now LESTER and ENUS!

On FESTUS! On ELMER! On ROSCOE and CLETUS!

From the top of the shack to them there garbage bins

Now Dash Away! Dash Away! Dash Away youins!

I heard a loud sound on the roof of muh shack.

Pud down muh beer and went fer muh gun rack.

He fell through the roof, plum killed my dog,

I swear that ole’ Santa looked just like Boss Hog.

He wore a T-shirt, rebel flag on the front,

And his jeans were all bloody from that morning’s hunt.

A big nekkid lady tattooed on his arm,

And he wore black boots that he’d picked up in ‘Nam.

His eyes, how they glazed from too much Wild Turkey.

From the side of his mouth hung a stick of beef jerky.

A scar on his cheek from a fight with the cops.

The veins on his face looked ready to pop.

The butt of a Marlboro clung to his lip

He wore a hip pack full of B-B-Q chips.

He had a fat face and a hairy beer belly.

I ain’t seen one that big since muh ex-wife Shelly.

He was gap-toothed and dumb with an I.Q. of three

And I laughed cause that redneck was smarter than me.

A wink of his eye, a fierce shake of his head,

From his hair came a rat that ran under the bed.

He reached in his sack, sipped his gin and tonic,

Then filled the kid’s stockings with Hooked on Phonics.

His toys came from Big Lots and they weren’t very nice

But he had lots of them and yuh can’t beat the price.

He gave us a tape of them hound dogs that sing Jingle Bells.

Some Crisco, some Spam, some Oatmeal Cream pies,

And a Nascar T-shirt in Double X size.

When the presents were gone and he had no more,

He staggered and stumbled right through muh screen door.

He hopped in his truck, to his sheep gave an order

“Hurry up youins! To the Tennessee border!”

And I heard him cry out, with a strong southern drawl,

“MERRY CHRISTMAS, YOU REDNECKS! MERRY CHRISTMAS Y’ALL… YEE HAWWWW!

Rules for Dating my Daughter

Rule One: I am aware that it is concidered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off your hips. Please don’t take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are idiots. Still, I want to be fair. You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants 10 sizes to big, and I will not object. However, to ensure that your pants do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place at your waist.

Rule Two: I’m sure that you have been told that in today’s world sex without a barrier can be deadly. Let me elaborate: When it comes to sex, I am the barrier and I will kill you.

Rule Three: I have no doubt the you are a popular fellow, with many oppurtunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my daughter, you will continue to date no one but her until she is through with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry.

Rule Four: As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not fidget and complain. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup — a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there why don’t you do something useful, like change the oil in my car?

Rule Five: The following places are not approporiate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are sofas, beds or anything softer than a wooden stool or folding chair; places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight; places where there is darkness; places where the ambient temperature would induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts or anything other than overalls, a sweater and a goose down parka, zipped up to her chin. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which feature chain saws are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes are better.

Rule 6: Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been, but on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless God of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me.

Rule 7: Be careful, be very careful. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy near Hanoi. When the flashbacks start, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean my guns as I sit at home waiting for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway, you should exit your car, with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safetly and early, then return to your car. There is no need for you to come inside. The camoflauged face in the window is mine.

Blonde With A Cell Phone

A blond gets a new cell phone from her husband.

The next day she goes to Wal-mart and her phone rings, so she answers it.

It was her husband. He says, “How’s the new cell phone?”

She replied, “Great…but how did you know I was at Wal-mart?”

Foreign Student

It was the first day of school (in US) and a new student, Suzuki, the son of a Japanese businessman, entered the fourth grade.

The teacher said, “Let’s begin by reviewing some American history. Who said ‘Give me Liberty, or give me death?’” She saw a sea of blank faces, except for that of Suzuki, who had his hand up. “Patrick Henry, 1775.”

“Very good! Who said, “Government of the people, by the people, for the people shall not perish from the earth’”? Again, no response except from Suzuki: “Abraham Lincoln, 1863.”

The teacher snapped at the class, “Class, you should be ashamed. Suzuki, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do.”

She heard a loud whisper: “F—–g Japanese.” “Who said that?” she demanded.

Suzuki put his hand up. “Lee Iacocca, 1982,”

At that point, a student in the back sighed, “I’m gonna puke!” The teacher glares and asks “All right! Now who said that?”

Again, Suzuki says “George Bush to Japanese Prime Minister, 1991.” Now furious, another student yells, “Oh yeah! Suck this!”

Suzuki jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the teacher, “Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997.”

Old local blacksmith

An old blacksmith relized he was soon going to quit working so hard. He picked out a strong young man to become his apprentice. The old fellow was crabby and exacting. “Don’t ask me a lot of questions,” he told the boy. “Just do whatever I tell you to do.” One day the old blacksmith took an iron out of the forge and laid it on the anvil. “Get the hammer over there,” he said. “When I nod my head, hit it real good and hard.” Now the town is looking for a new blacksmith.