When white man found this land, Indians were running it.
* No Taxes…
* No Debt…
* Plenty Buffalo…
* Plenty beaver!
* Women did most of the work.
* Medicine Man free!
* Indian men hunted and fished all the time!
* White man dumb enough to think he could improve system like that.
Sam: Would you punish me for some thing i didn’t do?
Teacher: No, of course not.
Sam: Good, because i didn’t do my homework.
Three Old Ladies
Three old ladies are sitting in a cafe, chatting about various things.
One lady says, “You know, I’m getting really forgetful. This morning, I was standing at the top of the stairs, and I couldn’t remember whether I had just come up or was about to go down.”
The second lady says, “You think that’s bad? The other day, I was sitting on the edge of my bed, and I couldn’t remember whether I was going to bed or had just woken up!”
The third lady smiles smugly, “Well, my memory’s just as good as it’s always been, knock on wood,” she says as she raps on the table. Then with a startled look on her face, she asks, “Who’s there?”
Lost my testicles
A man was being interviewed for a job. “Were you in the service?” asked the interviewer.
“Yes, I was a marine,” responded the applicant.
“Did you see any active duty?”
“I was in Vietnam for 2 years and I have a partial disability.”
“May I ask what happened?”
“Well, I had a grenade go off between my legs and I lost both testicles.”
“You’re hired. You can start Monday at 10 am.”
The man asked, “When does everyone else start? I don’t want any preferential treatment because of my disability.”
“Everyone else starts at 7 am but I might as well be honest with you. Nothing gets done between 7 and 10. We just sit around scratching our balls trying to decide what to do first.”
Why are men so smart during sex?
Cause they’re plugged into a genius!