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Funny Jokes

The largest collection of jokes.

Paper Street

One day in class, the teacher told everyone to turn to a blank sheet of paper in their notebooks. She noticed that Chip, the dumb jock, was having trouble with her directions.

“Have you found a blank piece yet, Chip?” said the teacher.

“Nope. I haven’t,” said the dumb jock. “Somebody went through and drew lines across all of the pages.”

Latest Funny Jokes

Police cars

Q: ‘Why does police drive white/blue cars with red/blue lights with a big police sign in the back?’
A: ‘So they don’t chase each other..’

Smart Sex

Why are men so smart during sex?

Cause they’re plugged into a genius!

Finish the start

My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start.

So far today, I have finished two bags of chips and a chocolate cake.

I feel better already.

Light bulb

Q: How many unemployed actors does it take to change a light bulb?

A: One hundred. One to change it, and ninety-nine to stand around and say, “Hey, I could’ve done that!”

Sign in the restroom

Sign in the restroom, above the urinal:
We know you’re in the rush
But please, don’t forget to flush.

This inspired me to a new verse:
Feel the bliss,
As you piss.
In that peace,
Flush it, please.