A Nerd, a Nude and a Bike
A nerd was walking on campus one day when his friend, another nerd, rode up on an incredible shiny new bicycle. The first nerd was stunned and asked, “Where did you get such a nice bike?”
The second nerd replied, “Well, yesterday I was walking home minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up to me on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, ’Take what you want!’”
The second nerd nodded approvingly and said, “Good choice. The clothes probably wouldn’t have fit.”
You are an Engineer
If you introduce your wife as “mylady@home.wife”
If your family sends you an e-mail instead of calling you to dinner
If you can quote scenes from any Monty Python movie
If you want an 8X CDROM for Christmas
If Dilbert is your hero
If you have modified your can-opener to be microprocessor driven
If you can name 6 Star Trek episodes
If the only jokes you receive are through e-mail
If you introduce your wife as “mylady@home.wife”
If your idea of good interpersonal communication means getting the decimal point in the right place
If you look forward to Christmas only to put together the kids’ toys
If you use a CAD package to design your son’s Pine Wood Derby car
I’m positive
Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, ’I think I’ve lost an electron.’
The other says ’Are you sure?’
The first says, ’Yes, I’m positive.’!
Ethiopian
What goes a hundred miles an hour around the desert?
An Ethiopian with a free voucher at McDonald’s!
Skeleton Joke
Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
It’s ’cause he didn’t have the guts!