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Funny Jokes

The largest collection of jokes.

You Might Be a Computer Nerd

You might be a computer nerd if you can’t get up in the middle of the night to go use the bathroom without checking your email!

Latest Nerd Jokes

How Many Ears

How many ears does Spock have?

Three: One on the right, one on the left, and the final “front ear.”

Prison

How do prisoners call each other?

On their cell phones.

Can Electrons be broken

Professor Sokolsky was lecturing his Atomic physics class. He asked, “If molecules can be split into atoms and the atoms split into electrons, can the electrons be broken down any further?”

A pupil replied, “I’m not certain, but a sure way to find out would be to mail some of them in a Christmas package marked ‘fragile’.”

Microsoft vs. shakespeare

They say that if you have an infinite number of monkeys typing at an infinite number of keyboards for an infinite period of time, you will get the collected works of Shakespeare.

If you get the source code to Microsoft Windows, you need to add more monkeys.

I’m positive

Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, ’I think I’ve lost an electron.’

The other says ’Are you sure?’

The first says, ’Yes, I’m positive.’!