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Funny Jokes

The largest collection of jokes.

Pregnant

Q: I’m two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?

A: With any luck, right after he finishes school.

Latest Q&A Jokes

Cow Disease

Q: Why can’t men get mad cow disease?

A: Because they’re pigs.

What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

Q: What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?
A: A good start!

How many men does it take to open a beer?

Q: How many men does it take to open a beer?

A: None. It should be opened when she brings it.

How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?

Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?

A: When she starts a sentence with “A man once told me…”

Lightbulb to the fuse

Q: What did the lightbulb say to the fuse ?

A: That’s a blow!