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Funny Jokes

The largest collection of jokes.

Beating of his life

Mr. George beats ten armies while in his dream. Alas! He saw them on the street the following morning; they recognized him and give him a thorough beating of his life.

Latest Veterans Day Jokes

How many guns do you need for a gunfight?

A General asks his comrades “how many guns do you need for a gunfight?”

“Two”, comrades replied.

“Why two?” the general asked. “One gun for us to shoot at enemies and another gun for our enemy to shoot back at us”

Beating of his life

Mr. George beats ten armies while in his dream. Alas! He saw them on the street the following morning; they recognized him and give him a thorough beating of his life.

Cool breeze

A new soldier joining the troops today stopped the propeller halfway thinking it causes the cool breeze which is too much for everyone.

Toy soldiers

John’s Father brought home new soldiers but they can’t fight, why? “They were all toy soldiers”

What will you do?

Because Dave’s late Uncle is a soldier, so he dreamt to be a soldier. This annoys Dave’s dad and made him ask Dave, “Imagine you are in a camp surrounded by enemies and you are sleeping with C4 (bombs) around you, what will you do?”

Dave answered and said, “I will stop imagining instantly”.